Newsletter: Fleggy retirement special!

Dear Team Members, welcome to this week's very exciting newsletter.

Exciting news this week as Sky Sports uncover a breaking news story from deep in the badlands of East Hull:

This is how Sky viewers saw the dramatic events

That's right folks, Fleggy has finally done the decent thing and fucking retired from pool.  Most people thought he already had retired.  Pool in Hull has never been in better shape as from yesterday.  There is now renewed interest in trips to Yarmouth, everyone's joining the county team again and Lucy faints in Hustlers when she hears the news:

Bricknell Ave hold an impromptu street party:

David shows the bar staff in Three John Scotts just how happy he is:

"THAT'S how happy I am bitch.  You made me do that"

Gareth Potts sent a personal message to Martin on his tearful retirement:

Hi there, Fleddy, it's me Gareth here.  Just want to wish you all the

best on your retirement from the game.  Obviously I've never heard of you Fleddy,

and no one I know has heard of you and by all accounts the lads from Hull,

especially my great Tour mate Wayne Bristow, are really glad to see the back of you. 

You were a disgrace to our sport and, frankly, just fuck off.

Thanks to Gareth for his kind words there.

Meanwhile in Newbridge Club Fleggy's past opponents are gutted at the retirement of their only win of the whole season:

"He was our only frame"

Fleggy gets tired after his long emotional day:

Wetherspoons newest drunk

Three John Scotts has a new place to put any unwanted ketchup you may want to discard:

Fleggy burger

Three John Scotts has a new place to put your phone if you so wish:

Dog and Duck in Walkington next week lads.  Oh, and well done on winning the cup.  If we did win the cup?  Fuck knows.


And, not forgetting Fleggs and his "amazing" pool career, at this emotional time for you.....the lads have carefully put together a very thoughtful and poignant message on your deserved retirement......

 

Thank fuck that shit cunt has fucked off.

 

Touching.





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May 3rd Newsletter

Dear team members, welcome to this week's newsletter.

In pool news, first sighting in Hustlers of certain people:

On holiday in Magaluf, David has a dip in the hotel pool:

 

"Look Beverley, I told you it goes all stringy"

And amazing scenes as fleggy finally wins a frame:

Fan dabby-double-dozey.

The doubles this week saw us all at Hustlers apart from David who was doing some international jisming.  Will I Am and PJ were first round losers which was quite funny.  5-2 really flattered our two but it was good to know Will I Am is still alive after he'd not been seen outside the crackden for some 18 weeks.  Rich/Richard/Rik Dunham/Owen and Q made it through to the next round where they met Martin and Ishanistan.  Fleggs was RUBBISH and Ishanistan was RUBBISH and they played RUBBISH and got murdered, even though Rich/Richard/Rik Dunham/Owen was still upset over Chelsea.  Chelsea won 3-1 last night and he never really watched any of it yet he was still not happy!  I really can't understand that boy.

A man not happy about Chelsea.

Yesterday.

Dog and Duck in Walkington next week lads.  See you there.






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April 30th Newsletter

Welcome to this week's newsletter.

In pool news, Mark Jubb suffers his first ever defeat against his brother Chris and is not happy to say the least:

Mark Jubb after losing to Chris.

Yesterday.

Perko gives an interview about the state of pool in Hull:

"There's too many politics in the game.  They won't even let me play".

And David meets his new mother-in-law for the first time:

Nice to meet to you Margaret, I've heard a lot about you.

Hustlers X played in the cup semi final last week, away down Southcoates Lane somewhere against some other team.  As usual, we couldn't quite pull off the whitewash as we had Fleggs playing again.

Quigs is now banned from borrowing Martin's cue.  Martin has had enough.  In fact, after having not seen each other for about seven weeks, Martin's first words to Quigs were "Have you got your cue sorted yet?"  Q's cue has only been at Craftsmens Cues for 3 years now.  Chris Jubb said "Yeah, Martin has even put a big domed tip on his cue just so Quigs won't borrow it, cos he knows Q hates big domed tips. Fucking rightly so as well the fucking slag".  Bit of an outburst from Chris there.  Quigs now uses a pub cue in sheer contempt.

Q's cue.  Not bad.

Doubles night this week lads, everyone is at Hustlers apart from Fleggs and Ishan who are at Dog and Duck in Walkington.  Ishan's leaving Spring Bank at half 10 in the morning on his Grifter if you need a lift. 

Richard/Rik/Rich Dunham/Owen must've had a football bet go down in the Europa league last week as he really wasn't happy about Chelsea.  I've told him loads of times, Torres isn't the striker he was.  Plus that Europa League's a minefield for betting.






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